I don't know how or when it happened, but i've become extremely antisocial lately. My home, and more specifically my room......although if we're gonna talk about specifics then i'd really have to narrow it down to my red chair which has great ass space......has become my sanctuary. The place where i read my books, meditate, plot world domination, watch tv, have sexual fantasies (yes, you don't ever want to sit in this chair!!!), play with my dog, have evil fantasies of all the people i can't stand (i know it's bad but i love doing this!!!), etc etc.
So i simply can't bare to leave it. And even if i do, i am constantly longing to be right back in it.
My antisocial behaviour first emerged when i started putting on so much weight and i was ashamed to be seen in public. As every chubby worth their double cheese burger would know, you somehow imagine that everyone is looking at you and secretly wondering what is the size of your arse, and if it got any bigger would it be considered another natural disaster! This paranoia is of course confirmed when you have morons who actually come up to you and comment that you've put on weight!!!
Words have not yet been invented to described such bastards so i will just call them rude, insensitive, uncultured fucking asswipes!
Doesn't quite do it justice, i know......
But by the time i got comfortable with the weight and more specifically couldn't give a rat's arse about how i looked, my arse and the chair had somehow fused together to form this one cohesive blob of friendship! In fact it's practically my soulmate! I became blissfully comfortable in this sanctuary of mine and refused to leave it. I would often make lame-ass excuses all the time so that i wouldn't have to meet with friends - i was sick, going out of the country, busy travelling, had another function etc etc (i don't wanna give away all the excuses since i still wanna use some of them....hee hee)
If you've been on the receiving end of these excuses...well....i realize i should apologize, but frankly i just can't be arsed to do even that!!
See! Total antisocial tendencies!
My close friends keep nagging me cos i don't bother going out anymore, but i'm happy, and shouldn't that be the point?? My favouritte thing to do on a friday night is to curl up in my chair and read a good book. Then on weekends there's the EPL and La Liga to look forward to. But somehow even though i am happy living in my shell, i somehow have this nagging feeling that this kinda behaviour is not really right. But i can't figure out why i feel that way! Our social programming i guess
But i suppose if i wanna get laid i actually have to leave my chair (unless i'm thinking of resorting to online matchmaking which i'm not desperate enough to do.....just yet) and go out into the big bad world.
One must always prioritize!
So from next year onwards, i guess i'll make more of an effort to be 'in the country' :)
Word of the day, need we even say it, is ARSE (a great word, i might add!)
22 comments:
If you hung out with me I'd chase you up trees so your butt would soon be in great shape, Saby. Then, me and my females would draw lots for who has the the first bite!
Oh GB...you'd win by default!!! Surely i wouldn't allow anyone other than my favourite Gorilla to have first dibs!
And i would love being chased by you and your women around :)))
"i don't wanna give away all the excuses since i still wanna use some of them..."
Very funny Saby - always keep a few good excuses in reserve for times of crisis.
Being happy should always be the point....but ease off on the football and plan that trip to the UK you're always talking about.
Arse is a term that's used all the time in Australia. Much better than the american copout of "ass"
Yaaawwwwwnnnn...
So, what else is new? :P
Scurf : Oh Scurf the plans i have for my trip!!!! Old Trafford to watch Manchester (unfortunately a friend is a fan!) and of course Anfield. Will try to squeeze in Stamford Bridge. Then off to Camp Nou to watch my fav team in the world and perhaps The Bernabeu to watch the annoying, but hot Ronaldo!
My friends tell me it's gonna be impossible but if we're there for 2 weeks (3 weekends) i think we'll actually be able to make it!!
What time do you support by the way?
Nurse : I concur!
Although i do swear by the queen's english, i do use it interchangeably....blame it on MTV...hee hee.
Kavi: BITE!
I understand how you feel. I've had many of those 'unsocial' moments.
But first step is acknowledging it...now you only need to get out there and have some fun! :)
yea, those rude people. hang them. try any kind of exercise you like. while your arse may not shrink to how it was but mentally, it keeps you sane. at least for me that is (although of late due to some limitations, i've been acting like you too - spending a lot of time alone at home and giving excuses to the world)
anyways, for me its my mom - every time we meet she has to point out that i'm now fat or have put on weight.
Anu : Nicely said dear :)
But it's easier said than done...i feel like i need to go for a class or something on how to socialize with 3 dimensional people!
Jaya : Aiyo mum's can really annoy you la. My mum used to be like that...very negative and full of comments. But have been telling her bout the laws of attraction and being positive and all and now she's actually stopped making all her negative comments!
But then u still have the rest of the world to deal with.....
Sod em. I think only people who are miserable with their own lives go around commenting on others. Pointless getting worked up over them
You're still young...stop being a hermit! LOL
Lol yes grampaw!!!
You know u do have a point.....people whonarehappy and content with life are usually to caught up in their bubble of bliss to pass snarky comments. If only they had signs on their forehead so we could differentiate the miserable from the content. Can be quite deceiving ;p
at least it worked for your mom :P
my mom will listen and follow for half a day, then back again.
i hate the fat word
The use of that word should constitute child abuse!!!
As an antisocial person myself (and I'm antisocial almost ALL the time), I don't know how to help you get off your arse. (Love the word - and it is indeed much better than ass, which is the word I usually use)
However, I too find people who think they have the right to comment on your weight (regardless if you've gained or lost it) pretty much annoying.
Exactly! It's not really their need to point out that you've put on weight (like helloo...i have a mirror, i know what i look like!!), it's more their need to just pick on you and pass comments about every single thing. So yeah even when you've lost a lot of weight, they will comment but often in a negative way!
Bitter morons!
I am also antisocial. Ive come to dread my wife telling me we've been invited to a party.
I feel the same way when my mum tells me we haveto go visit someone. In fact I'll be anxious for days before that, trying to think of a way to get out of it! ;p
great plan you got ;)
Well so far it hasn't been very successful.
But I'm still happy....heeeeee
Yep also very antisocial, party invites, what party invite? The one I threw in the trash...haha..shhh don't tell. My arse wants to stay home.
My arse too!!!! They must be related ;p
Thanks for visiting
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