Saturday, April 10, 2010

RIP Sansovino Andrea Anthony Gomez

I woke up this morning to the horrible news that my cousin had passed away.

He was only 34 years old and he died under such tragic circumstances

Because he was dealt a horrible hand, he went down the wrong road and in the end suffered the horrible consequences. But despite his choices, not only was he an absolutely handsome bugger, he was also one of the most loving and affectionate people i knew....in fact he was almost childlike in his affection.

What irks me more is the fact that he was cremated without any of us being told so i couldn't even get to see him for the last time and say a proper goodbye. I know sometimes when one is in a state of shock you tend to do things without thinking, but what some people fail to realize is that the point of funerals is not for the deceased, but rather for the family and friends to make their peace with the person and with the situation. So yes i am heartbroken that i could not get to see him.....particularly since i have not seen him in a while.

But more than anythin i am just pissed. Pissed because all of this could have been avoidable. They say that you can't be pissed with those who victimize you cos in the end we're all victims of victims, but you know what?? If that's the case i'd like to meet the motherf****** who started this victimization. Cos it doesn't change the fact that you had to go thru all that crap. You still had to be a victim of someone who chose to abuse you and ruin your whole life. And you end up burying your pain in whatever way you can...be it booze, or drugs, or building huge huge walls around yourself or even by hurting everyone around you.

And even if you're lucky enough to become aware and strong and spiritual and shit and forget the pain and forgive the past and bury all that shit, you still end up carrying it with you for the rest of your life. And whatever it is, you still had to ride that 'bloody wave'....for tooo many bloody years! And that reality will always be present in your mind.

Trying to understand and accept a concept or truth doesn't change the fact that it happenend!

And this only convinces me more than anything that God is a sadistic son of a bitch who has major issues!


I'm sorry i wasn't there for you in your time of need, but i hope you find peace....finally....


RIP Couz

9 comments:

Terra Shield said...

I'm sorry to hear of your loss.

Kevin said...

My condolences

MKL said...

Sorry to hear all that, Saby. 34 is so young... :(

sabrina said...

Terra : Thanks dear

Kevin : Thanks babe

MKL : It is indeed such a tragedy...but i hope he will be happier now...

Kavi said...

my deepest condolences...

we know karma will come back to bite the person who victimizes.

Shit happens. But we also learn great lessons from it.

my prayers for ur couz and family, babe.

Anu said...

Condolences to you and your family.

nursemyra said...

I'm so sorry Saby xx

sabrina said...

Kav : So true babe...thanks

Anu & Nurse : Thank you dears

Joshua said...

Hi there,
I'm Mrs. Prema and used to know Andy as a young boy back when he was in Terengganu...

I just saw his 30th day anniversary of his demise in the Star paper today and decided to google his name and found your blog...

I was shocked and felt deeply saddened by the news...
If u don't mind, may i know how did Andy pass away?